Self Discovery

For some it takes awhile to find your real happiness. For me, I was just blinded by material things. I had an epiphany today. The things in life that make me truly happy, is my family, my boyfriend, and my religion. I love to stay at home and spend quality time with the ones I love. They are the ones who love me unconditionally, no matter how imperfect I am. I traded being the cliche 21 year old for a stay at home kid who just wants nothing more but her family, her beliefs, and her boyfriend. I love playing with my nieces, cuddling with them, and being a kid. I love to find inspiration from my siblings, and hear their own life stories. I love to have serious and funny conversations with my boyfriend who is also my bestfriend. How can one trade precious time of being with the ones you love for parties, for fashion? That was me before, but I couldn't be any more happier of what I achieved at this point in life.

At the end of this year, I can say that I know what is true happiness and what isn't. My life this year has been more stable than in the years before. Even though this year has had the most tragedy to ever come into my life, surprisingly it was the most peaceful. I can feel myself growing and learning, and I do not want it to stop. I can feel myself maturing, but I know I'm not there yet. Now that I have the "Where to find happiness" marked off my checklist, now its time to learn "How to be happy even in times of peril". Thus, I love everything that surrounds me. I love how I can say that i'm in love. I love, love. Wonderful year, 2010.

Tireless writing this online novel project that I have. Forget all the homework that I have! My inspiration only comes once in a blue moon! Besides eating, and breathing, the only thing on my mind is this novel. So keep on reading, as I will continue to add pages once a week. Thanks guys!

Social Networking

I just made active my accounts on my Twitter and Tumblr. -___-. Man, it gets really tiring to keep updating every site. So this is what everyone does for about two to three hours of their day? In ways, I guess it's a good thing that people who are not social in real life can create a persona where they are the most confident on the internet. As for me, I'm just trying to get a bigger audience for my writing. I'm starting to create a online novel, all same day work as I go along....So be sure to wait for that...It will be on my Tumblr. So just go ahead to that one....This blog will be just of my scribbles and thoughts.

Daisymiclat.tumblr.com

Regret.

Good morning!

I woke up today with full conviction and with a renewal of the physical body. Today I thought about all the things that I could have done. To be a fashion writer for a now known website, to work as an intern for Toms, and many other things that I could have done. For a brief moment, I was actually pretty sad that I could not succeed in those areas. But than I thought to myself, I am completely content with all that I have now. Yes I was not able to finish my past dreams, but those aren't what I want now. I have the unconditional love from my family, my boyfriend, and most importantly the love from my beliefs and creator himself. If I didn't fail at all of those past goals, well I would be a different person right now. I have everything that I need already with me. So if things don't go your way, don't be in desperation. Something better will definitely come along. Seek your happiness not in this world but within the spirit. Than the path will be in clear view.

Solid.

Currently reading Tolstoy, I am really fascinated by what he says about the Christian church. He believes that it should be more about seeking the inner-self, the humbleness of one's earthly lives, and to love one another just as Jesus loves his people. Throughout my spiritual journey, I have come to many crossroads of where my faiths and beliefs are tested. But there is no doubt that the lord himself is guiding me past every crossroad, past every ideology that may keep me grounded in this world. The reason why I began reading Tolstoy, was because a friend who majored in philosophy referred his works to me. I began reading his works because I was confused of my spiritual knowledge. I was enlightened in so many different ways that contradict one another that I was seriously at one of the major crossroads of my life. Not knowing what Tolstoy's philosophy was, I was amazed and astounded that even himself, was a believer of what I believed in, the true christian beliefs. The Christianity that was not corrupted by man's changes and interpretations, but the knowledge of God. The love of one another, the humbleness of one's self, and the spiritual contentment in the inner self. Furthermore, it may have been a coincidence that I picked up this book by Tolstoy, or fate, but either way I'm glad that it reaffirmed my beliefs of what I will always believed in. I do agree with him that many have really gone astray on the true beliefs of Christianity, but one day I hope that they all may recognize what is important.

I wish...

I keep deleting and rewriting this entry, just because I have so much thoughts and concerns on what is going on with the world today. Not only with the world, but with the souls in it. As we progress into the generations to come, I only wish but one thing, please save us before this world consumes us whole. Wake us up before this world creates insanity, confusion, hatred, conflict, anger, jealousy, all within our hearts and our minds. May the corruption of the world, the organized politics, the organized negotiations that the people cannot do anything about not overtake us and drag our souls with it. You can have a revolution all you want, but that will never fix the conflict that we will ALWAYS have here. You can protest all you want, but little by little some new conflict will come in and knowing history, all these revolutions will repeat itself. It will NEVER BE POSSIBLE TO HAVE PEACE HERE ON EARTH. No matter in which way we look at it, the world itself is deteriorating, and we have all these "trusting" people to tell us that it will be okay. The only thing that we can do, is to live amongst it, but to not trust in it. Be your own self, you know that there is a soul in you. The spirit that makes you love, that makes you care for others. Atheist or Religious, you know what is right and what is wrong. All I can ask of you, is to find the truth, whatever it may be, and stray away from what the world may be telling you to do. Find your own true path, and never stray from it. Let not the things of this world create desperation, but all the more strengthen you on your journey. In the end, it is really up to you to decide if you want to live in love, if you want live in your pure spirit.

While here, I encourage the helping of others, for human rights, because if you can believe it, there are those that are less fortunate in this already dying world.

(Picture, 2007 Japanese Reporter shot down by Burmese Regime.)

My Peace and The World's War

I currently am spending all my time reading this huge brick of mine. Peace And War by Leo Tolstoy, one of the most famous Russian Literature that everyone knows about. So as I spend my days reading, my entries will be a little light, unless I have a deep passion to write.

To tell you the truth of where I am in my life, I have gone past the temptations. I take no pleasure in things of this world anymore. I see my life of doing what I have to do to get by, to work hard, but not indulging my whole life into it. This life will be nothing but a blur when it is over, so may no stress take over my thoughts and consume my life with it. The roaring lion that comes into my dreams many times is just a reminder for me. The world is the roaring lion trying to swallow me whole. The damages that are here, the people, everything.....It is nothing to me anymore. But I won't allow you to think that I won't have my part in shedding light into the darkness. For some people will live their whole life in the endless cycle of darkness, never finding the enlightenment and peace that they wish their whole lives for. The main reason, is they never look in the right places, they submit themselves to the lion that is just waiting right around the corner. One only advice that I have, is because I myself am still learning; Forget your problems, forget it, try and live the best you can, but don't think that this is it for you. You'll someday wake up from this dream as if it was just a memory.